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Are you wishing for a sneak peak inside the covers of this book before you buy a copy of your own? Below, find the introduction in full. Enjoy!
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Does life come in twos, or is it a single entity? Time revolves around the twins of day and night. A couple joins as husband and wife. Children count the animals that went into Noah’s ark two by two. A farmer yokes his oxen. The chef prepares a candlelight dinner for a man and a woman. An electrician works with positives and negatives. A mathematician thinks in terms of addition and subtraction. When my aunt Emma thought in twos, she envisioned sugar and creamer sets. They were one of her life passions.
Aunt Emma collected many elegant, lovely, dainty, different, and sometimes odd-looking sugar and creamer sets. Several shelves in her china cabinet stored these sets. Sometimes she bought them new. Other times she found them by scrounging tables at garage sales. Whenever she discovered another unique sugar and creamer, she took the set home and made room for it on the shelf. Perhaps these sets symbolically completed something in my aunt Emma’s life, as she never had—a husband. The sugars and creamers became the “china dolls” for the children she never had. They were her pride and joy as she told stories to those who had time to gaze upon them.
Eventually Aunt Emma moved into a smaller house, and she could no longer store her many sets. As a token of love, Aunt Emma invited nieces and nephews to come to her home and pick out one set from her beloved collection. Although I was one of the last to arrive that day, she still had an ample amount of sets available to choose from.
My eyes roved over the pretty sets waiting in silence to be chosen. A single bone-colored creamer caught my attention, its delicate shape reminiscent of an oil lamp from millennia ago. Its tapered top and bottom edges, pencil-lined with gold, accentuated the slender handle with its delicate gold streak. The gentle curved spout was large enough for cream to flow generously. On the rounded sides of the creamer clung wisps of tiny blue and rose-colored wild flowers. “Aunt Emma,” I asked, “where is its partner?”
She smiled and shook her head slightly. “I really don’t know,” she replied softly. “It is just a single one. If you pick that one, I have no sugar bowl to go with it,” she added regretfully.
My gaze returned to the table, seeking one set that was meant for me. I found none. My eye kept admiring the beauty of the bone creamer with the wildflowers. I reached out to pick it up. The handle curved nicely between my right fingers as I cupped my left hand under its base. It fit. This creamer defines who I am. Alone, single—one who sits among twos. Perhaps one day I will stumble across its partner or its partner will find me.
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I am a single woman. I have never married. Like the bone creamer, I am surrounded by a married world of pairs. I have not always done well accepting the gift of being single. At times I have deeply longed for a husband and family. However, decades have passed, and I remain a single woman today.
Why do some people marry and others do not? Was this really the way it was meant to be? Could it perhaps have been God’s original plan that all people marry? We seem to know instinctively that men and women were created not to walk alone, but in relationship with each other. Why then are there so many single people in the world?
My purpose in this book is to tangle with some of the questions I have just asked and explore God’s intentions for single women. But I will speak to married women as well. The questions we ask and the answers we seek are not as different as you might think. Perhaps some of the ideas will introduce you to a perspective on singleness and marriage you may not have considered before.
Though singleness has been my gift and calling in life, God has walked with me in my journey as a single woman, and taught me some things I could not have learned on any other path. This book tells a part of that story.
My desire and prayer is that as you read this book, you will come to know God more fully and discover a new joy in your journey, whether single or married.